blog reboot

Hey there!  I know it's been quite awhile since I last posted, so I've decided to share a bit about what's been going on in my life and why I stepped back from Messy Little Cook for a few months.

As you may know, Trevor and I welcomed our daughter Hannah last summer.  I love her beyond measure, but she completely turned my world upside down.  When Hannah was about eight weeks old I was diagnosed with Postpartum Depression.  At that time I was overwhelmed, stressed and anxious.  I cried all the time and I fantasized about running away from home.  Other symptoms of PPD are a loss in previous interests and a change in appetite; I experienced both of these.  I didn't ever feel hungry and I had to remind myself to eat (especially because I'm breastfeeding Hannah).  I didn't care what I ate and I didn't want to have anything to do with cooking.  It didn't have the same appeal to me, which felt strange because I had loved looking at cookbooks, trying out new recipes and eating at restaurants before I had Hannah.  I just felt like a hollow, empty shell of myself.

Luckily, I was diagnosed early and I found good support right away.  I started seeing a counsellor and I see my family doctor regularly.  My family and friends have been incredibly supportive and I know I wouldn't be where I am now without their love.  I still struggle sometimes, but things have definitely improved.  Through this experience I've learned that I'm not trying to get back to "my old self" but I have to create a "new self"; one that has been through this experience and picked up a few lessons along the way.  So onwards to my new self it is - I'm hoping to be able to find some more time for blogging.  At this point I've got the motivation to write (and I've been doing a bit of cooking and have a few photos) but I need the time, and time is a precious commodity in the life of a new mom.
Thanks for reading, and if you've been checking my blog during my absence, thanks for waiting for me.  I know this is a heavy topic so I'll follow it up with something lighter :)

Trev and I tried out Rge Rd last weekend (thanks to Grandma for babysitting!) So I'll get a post ready for that as soon as I can.